Recently in Kieran Category

Jilly, Evelyn and I took Kieran to university this afternoon.

For days, now, Jilly and Evelyn have been getting themselves worked up because Kieran is going away to university. My reminding them that Kieran moved out to his dad's months ago has made no difference to their moods, so I've now given up trying.

The M62 and M60 motorways were chocker-block full of a variety of vehicles packed to the gills with quilts, pots and pans and stereo equipment. We arrived at Kieran's new halls with very little kerfuffle (Jilly recommended the use of that particular - and peculiar - word), and settled him in nicely. Kieran's room is a reasonable size and includes an en-suite toilet and shower; Kieran seemed quite happy, unlike his mum and sister.

I was eventually able to tear the ladies away from Kieran and we made our way home; Jilly and Evelyn spent the whole journey sobbing in the back of the car. When we got home, Jilly received a call from Kieran assuring her that he was OK, and that he was sat with his new neighbours drinking coffee. Jilly and Evelyn left Kieran with a selection of buns (which he'd found), but he didn't say whether or not he was sharing them!

Jilly was very excited today as it was Kieran's first half-day at college. Kieran only had to go in for the morning to enrol and, just as he has done everything else associated with the beginning of his college career, he was very laid back about it...or so it seemed until he got home.

Obviously interested in Kieran's first impressions of his new college, Jilly and I asked him about his first morning. Typically, all Kieran wanted to tell us about were the, "many sexy ladies", who appear to outnumber the lads by about 3-to-1.

It's a hard life!

Kieran's GCSE results were published today and I don't know who is most relieved (no...really I don't!) Kieran has seemed quite relaxed about the results day, until recently, but Jilly has just become more and more anxious.

Kieran collected his results from school and passed an astonishing 11 GCSEs (one more than the number of GCEs his mum and I passed together!)

And here are Kieran's results:
'A' Physics
'B' English Language
'B' English Literature
'B' Biology
'B' Chemistry
'B' History
'B' Design and Technology
'B' Religious Studies
'B' Media Studies
'C' Mathematics
'C' German

Jilly has only just stopped 'blubbing' with pride. We're both extremely proud of him (as I know his dad is) and we're all especially proud of the fact that Kieran has now confirmed his place at Greenhead College to study Mathematics with Mechanics, Psychology, Physical Education and Physics...oh yes!

Of course, Jilly was very quick to point out that, since failing to pass a tonne of GCEs at school, Jilly has since qualified as a registered nurse (with an HND), went on to complete her BSc (Hons) in Adult Nursing and then passed a certificate in Oncology and a diploma in Diabetes!

It is Kieran's school Prom Night tonight and, while Kieran seemed to take the occasion in his stride, Jilly was absolutely besides herself. While we haven't discussed exactly why Jilly was so stressed about the night, I believe it was largely down to the fact that Kieran looked so very good in his rented suit...I'm sure she'll correct me.

Anyway, Chris' family joined Chris at our house to take photographs of the two boys getting into the Roller, before they went to collect another two of their mates.

Both the boys looked fantastic...I'm sure they're going to have an excellent night.

...now, it's the long wait.

Kieran finished the last of his GCSE exam's today. Brilliant!

I'd like to say that you could see all the anxiety and stress slip from his face, the moment he walked through the door; but he's never seemed even remotely stressed during the last four weeks of exam's.

So, when is Kieran's 'D-day'? GCSE results are issued on 21 August 2008! Good Luck, Kieran!

My only hope, now, is that Kieran doesn't remember Jilly's naive offer of cash for A and A* grades...I certainly have!

Officially, it was Kieran's last day at school today. He has to return for a further four weeks of GCSE examinations, but he has finished his schooling...and Jilly is besides herself...oh dear!

Of course, (and, I am reminded, typically!) I hadn't been sensitive enough to realise that the combination of Jilly being 'a bit hormonal' and her Kieran Prince Binky being all grown-up and leaving school, was enough to drive her to despair...this is something for which I will be eternally sorry after the inevitable and inexorable 'We're getting divorced' row that Jilly and I enjoyed on Wednesday night!

It was with a great deal of pride that Jilly rang me, this afternoon, to screetch down the phone that Kieran has been offered a place at Greenhead College to study Mathematics with Mechanics, Psychology, Physical Education and Physics.

Kieran says that he has been told that he will need to get 5 GCSE passes at 'C' grade to attend the college.

Jilly and I are both very proud of him.

Well done, Kieran!

And...at a little before midnight, last night, Jilly waved goodbye to Kieran as he left Huddersfield on his first foreign holiday with school. Kieran has gone to Traben-Trabach in the Mosel region of Germany for a week.

Obviously worried about her Little Kieran Prince Binky being away from home for a week without her, Jilly is - I know - going to be intolerable until he comes back; things are going to be a little stormy, and no mistake!

I don't know what Jilly is more afraid of; that Kieran might meet a German girl who will lead him astray, or that one of his female school friends might have the same idea. Personally, I'd be more afraid of the pretty prince being led astray by a big hairy Albrecht! What I do know, is that Jilly made reference to all the, "...girls swarming all over the coach with breasts and long flicky hair". [She told me that I should quote her for the purposes of this entry!].

Jilly has finally begun to relax as Kieran has phoned her this evening [at 20:00] to tell her that he arrived safely and that he has eaten dinner. Apparently, they were given what Kieran referred to as a dirty meal of fat meat and cabbage. I can only hope that the food improves!

We know he'll have an excellent time...the lucky monkey!

Kieran left for a fortnight in glorious Florida this morning. In the run up to last night [when Jilly, Evie and I dropped him off at his dad's house], he's hardly mentioned the trip, or the four-star accommodation he'll be staying in, so his departure seemed to creep up on us out of the blue...er...NOT!.

It goes without saying that we'll all miss him terribly [especially his mum, who still hasn't stopped sobbing], and we all hope that he is able to keep up with 'goings on' at home via the 24/7 Internet access that he apparently has in the suite of rooms he and his dad are occupying! Of course this means that apart from keeping up with Gingatopia, he will also be able to keep up with the football and cricket at http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport

Have an XLNT time Kieran. We all miss you already!

In reply to the Wassocks post, 'Donkey?', Kieran's lucky nag was Hedgehunter...and the bloody thing came in after Kieran backed it [each way] at 10-1. Lucky liddle @$%#?!...

UPDATE: 14 April 2005