Sat with Evelyn this morning, Jilly asked Evie what she thought I might like for my birthday.
Evelyn's first suggestion? "A Nintendo DS?" (Where did that come from; I dunno!)
Jilly pointed out that I'm not really any good at video games, and probably wouldn't enjoy a DS. Could Evelyn think of anything else that I might like for my birthday?
"Er...some sausages?"
I've said it before, SHE IS A LIDDLE BEAUDEE!
Evie has always eaten crisps 'like a laydee'; one crisp at a time.
Being a bit of a pig, I always eat crisps by the fist full (I can't help myself, no matter how hard I try to remember). Seeing me eating a packet of crisps this afternoon, Evelyn looked up and told me,
"Just one at a time, Daddy; simmer yer beans!"
That told me!
Recently, whenever Jilly or I have become a little short tempered with Evelyn (and she seems to know when we're not exactly angry with her), Evelyn has become reciting a line from an episode of Spongebob Squarepants she watched recently. I say 'recite'; more accurately, she sings the line.
"Somebody's getting crabbeeeeeee!", she tells us.
No matter how irritated I've become, this always seems to diffuse the situation. I'm laughing - now - as I type these words.
She's so funny; and increasingly manipulative (the line seems not to be so effective with Jilly).
Evelyn crept into our bedroom this morning (just as we were about to get up) and (rather clumsily) climbed into our bed.
"Turn over, Daddy", Evelyn told me, as she collapsed into the bed between Jilly and I, "...your breath smells like a farm!"
Charmin'
But, it doesn't stop there; oh no!
As I was typing this entry, I remembered a comment that Jilly told me Evelyn had made to her very recently. Evelyn has recently shown a lot of interest in wearing 'less-than-suitable' clothing. Evelyn recently insisted on wearing knee-high socks with her school skirt and blouse (in a bizarre Britney Spears stylee) to school. During a VERY heated discussion, Jilly may have told Evelyn that she would look like a 'slut'.
Coming downstairs after getting dressed for an evening out tonight, Jilly asked Evelyn and I our opinions about her outfit.
"Oh, Mummy", Evelyn exclaimed, obviously very impressed by Jilly's outfit, "You look like a lovely slut!"
And...Evelyn and I were watching Mamma Mia! (one of Evelyn's favourite movies) before bed a couple of nights ago. During one particular scene (when the Meryl Streep character sings 'Slipping Through My Fingers' about her daughter on the eve of her wedding), I 'got something in my eye', and may have looked a little like I was upset.
As I held Evie tightly on my lap, my loving daughter looked up to me, and told me,
"Pull yourself together, Daddy".
Overwhelmed by everyday adoration while at the dinner table tonight, I told Evelyn, "You are soooooooo beautiful!"; the sort of thing that loving fathers say to their beautiful daughters everyday.
Leaning back ever so slightly, holding up one hand, and looking me straight in the eyes, there was no mistaking what Evelyn wanted me to do.
"Get away from me!", she demanded.
While this is the response I hope Evelyn will give every other bloke that ever so much as looks at her before her sixteenth eighteenth twenty-first birthday, it was a little harsh on me, I thought!
After simply staring at Evelyn for a second or two (with an expression of mock astonishment), Evelyn burst out laughing and gave me a big hug. Beaudeeful liddle monster!
As I was putting Evelyn to bed this evening, she told me, "Your neck has two names. The back is called the neck", pointing to the back of her neck, "and the front is the throat, isn't it daddy?"
I told her that she was quite right, and congratulated her on pronouncing the 'th' sound, instead of 'f' when saying 'throat' as saying froat would make her sound rather stupid. "Saying 'stupid' is naughty daddy!", Evelyn quickly reminded me, and then continued, "'Throat' rhymes with 'scrote', doesn't it daddy?" I nearly choked on my tea! Not quite sure how to continue, I decided to explain that 'scrote' was a contraction of the word 'scrotum', and explained (as delicately as possible) what it meant, adding that she really oughtn't use the word. I told her that it wasn't a swear word, and that she wasn't in trouble, but that she really shouldn't say it - especially at school. Evelyn simply nodded, as she continued tucking her Ariel mermaid doll into bed. Beautiful!
We seem to have spent very little time with Deb and Kev recently, so it was lovely to be invited to theirs for the end of the Christmas/New Year holidays.
Again, in keeping with the rest of our 'festive' holiday, we enjoyed a quiet night on New Years Day after enjoying a lovely meal prepared by Deb and Kev (though Evelyn wasn't too keen on Debbie's excellent Christmas cake; her opinion? "Oh...That is RANK!" - we've done our very best to educate her, but what can I say?)
Julie, Ged and Sarah Mabel (Mini) Pini joined us for dinner at Deb and Kev's today, and Sarah was an absolute angel.
So...missing Jilly and Evelyn this morning (as I am writing this at work, and as they have spent the morning together at home), I rang Jilly for a quick chat and to see how their morning had been so far.
After a short discussion, Jilly asked Evelyn if she would like to say a quick 'hello' to me before hanging up.
"No", Evelyn said, "Er...I mean yes!". I could hear her in the background.
There was a slight delay, as Jilly passed Evie the phone.
"Poo Poo!", Evie called down the phone, and passed the phone back to Jilly.
Jilly expressed her opinion that that wasn't a very nice thing to say to me. Jilly started saying goodbye, and was about to hang up, when Evie asked to talk to me again, promising that she wouldn't, "...say that rude thing again!".
"OK then", I heard Jilly tell Evelyn, passing her the phone.
"Poo Poo!", Evelyn repeated with fantastic comedic timing.
She has nothing but respect, my girl! But I'm lovin' it!
Watching Strictly Come Dancing this evening, one of the couples walked to the dance floor as Evelyn made the following observation,
"For goodness sake, what on Earth is she wearing?"
I can't think where she has learned such an expression, but it tickled Jilly and I to hear her come out with it.
Needless-to-say, Evelyn wasn't talking about Lilia who, in my opinion, would look good in a flour sack
It was Father's Day today and, in celebration, Jilly had planned an excellent camping trip to Settle. Unfortunately, the felt we had to cancel the trip away as the weather was appalling on Friday night, and was forecast to be poor for the rest of the weekend. While Jilly and I are quite happy to camp in poor weather, neither of us wanted to pitch a tent in the rain! Fortunately, the camp site was happy to postpone our weekend for one later in the summer.
In makeshift celebration, then, Jilly and I took Evelyn for her first game of ten-pin bowling at Xscape in Castleford on Saturday. Evie really enjoyed knocking all the pins down, and was determined to roll the ball down the alley herself, rather than use the children’s er...ramp...er...thingies. After the bowling we stayed around for a while and watched people using the indoor ski centre (we've never been to Xscape before, and were curious about the indoor snow), and Evie was desperate to go on the snow sliders (toboggans).
After the bowling, we returned to Huddersfield via the Richard Dunn Sports Centre, where we went for a swim. While swimming with Evelyn is always a pleasure, the pool was extremely noisy and poorly lit (which makes seeing anything without my spectacles on practically impossible).
Today, I was treated to a special Father's Day trip to GoOutdoors in Middletown where Jilly managed to convince me that we didn't need another tent...bah! All the precious camping things are always very tempting and I was determined to buy another tent that I could stand up in but. Typically, GoOutdoors aren't in the habit of making gifts of their camping equipment, so I had to leave empty-handed.
Having left the Go-Outdoors, Jilly and I took Evelyn to Cannon Hall Farm, where she loves to play in the adventure playground and see all the farm animals (particularly the piddies). We had a lovely time on the farm, and even managed a spot of lunch on the outdoor picnic tables before the inevitable rain descended upon us.
During the afternoon on the farm, Jilly took Evelyn into the 'ladies' where Evelyn reportedly exclaimed,
"Aaaaarrrggghh! What is that smell? I think I'm gonna puke!"
The ladies' was more fragrant than the rest of the farm...apparently.
